MODEST ATTIRE

If you've got it, don't flaunt it.

Modesty is another aspect of clothing. We want to emphasize the person, not the body. The body is a distraction. In order for your personality and your character to shine forth, you can't be distracting other people by showing off your body parts.

Since men and women relate to the opposite sex differently, their style of modesty differs. What's a distraction for men is not necessarily a distraction for women, and vice versa. Men are generally more superficial and more easily distracted by the body. Therefore women are doing men a great favor by dressing modestly. But they are doing themselves an even bigger favor, because if a woman is modestly dressed, men will relate to her brains, personality, and character instead of her body parts. She may get less "attention," but she will command more respect.

By covering up what is superficial, we reveal what is more important.

Clothing

Clothing is not only linked to the body, but is a metaphor for the body. Just as clothing serves the body, the body serves the soul. You are a soul, and you are given a body to wear in this world. When you leave this realm and move on to the next, you leave your clothing behind. The less attached you are to physicality; the easier it is to leave it behind.
Just as you wouldn't mistake your sleeve for your arm, so too, you shouldn't confuse your body and your soul. The body is not you; the soul is you.
Also, it would be silly to conform your body to your shirt. If you are given a shirt a size too big, it would be silly to gain weight just to fill out the shirt. Your body is more important, and takes precedence over your clothes. Similarly it would be silly to conform your soul's desires to the desires of the body. Your soul is more important, and takes precedence over your body.

The Miniature Sanctuary

One of the blessings commonly given to a newly-engaged couple is that the match should "oleh yafeh." While it may be customary to rapidly rattle off the words, an examination of the English translation - the match should "go up well" - reveals that the wording is awkward and the deeper meaning is difficult to grasp. What is the underlying intention behind this curiously-worded blessing?

The Satmar Rebbe Rav Yoel Teitelbaum brilliantly explains that the word "oleh" is often used to connote the numerical value of a phrase. If so, we may re-interpret the blessing as stating that the new match should have the numerical value of the word "yafeh," which comes to 95 (yud, fey, hey).

But what is the significance of this seemingly arbitrary number?

The Sefer HaChinuch discusses the laws and reasons for the 613 mitzvos, listing them in the order of their mention in the Torah. He counts the 95th mitzvah as the commandment "and they shall make for Me a Sanctuary, and I shall dwell amongst them." This is a most appropriate blessing to give a new couple embarking on the establishment of their own personal miniature Sanctuary.

When God commands us

Imagine two families. One family insists that the children finish their homework before suppertime, has set bedtimes for the children, imposes curfews, and has all sorts of other rules and expectations. The second family allows the children to eat whenever they want, to stay out as late as they feel like, and does not impose any limitations or boundaries on the children whatsoever. The first family, with its structure and clear expectations, shows that the children's well-being is a top priority. The second family, with its total freedom and permissibility, may actually demonstrate a lack of care for the children. When God commands us, He shows that He cares about our well-being. When He does not command us, it can indicate a distance between us.
Rabbi Wagensberg

Giving with joy

The Gemara tells us that one who gives with simcha, receives no less than 17 brachos for his mitzvah

Gemara גמרא gamar; literally, "[to] study" or "learning by tradition")

Simcha (Hebrew: שִׂמְחָה śimḥāʰ; ) is a Hebrew word with several meanings. Literally, the word "simcha" means gladness, or joy. It comes from the root word "sameyach," which means glad or happy.

Brachos or brachot ברכות is Hebrew for blessings.

The primary meaning of the Hebrew word mitzvah ("commandment", Hebrew: מִצְוָה,

Choosing Slavery

Choosing slavery:
Should the bondmen say, "I love my master, and my wife and my children (21:5) and I have no desire for freedom," his master must pierce his ear with a awl by a doorpost, and he remains a bondman until yovel (Jubilee).
Why does he pierce his ear?
His ear heard God say on Mt. Sinai that Israel is His servant, and must not serve another, and yet this man chose to remain a bondman.
Why is the piercing done next to a door?
The door bore witness in Egypt. God watched over the doors of the Jews on the night that He struck the Egyptian first-born, and it was on that night that God proclaimed us His servants.
Why is he called, "a Hebrew bondman" rather than " an Israelite bondman"?
Because Israel is a superior name, which the Jews were called after God released them from their Egyptian bondage to serve Him and receive the Torah. But when they were enslaved in Egypt they were called Hebrews, as it says, "God of the Hebrews" (3:18)
Someone who has sold himself into slavery is likened to the Jews of Egypt, and so is termed Hebrew.
Why do they spill a drop of blood from his ear?
He has rejected the memory of the blood which was put on the door posts when God freed our forefathers from slavery.
The Midrash says: Says God, " I have opened a door for him to be free after six years of bondage, and he does not want to walk through it."
For this reason the piercing is done by the doorway.
Let us not forget the memory of the blood of Jesus. To do so would put us back into bondage. The Hebrew letter "Chet" means "Life" and shaped like a doorway. Make no mistake God did that for a reason. John 7-10 Then said Jesus unto them again, Verily, verily, I say unto you, I am the door of the sheep.
All that ever came before me are thieves and robbers: but the sheep did not hear them.
I am the door: by me if any man enter in, he shall be saved, and shall go in and out, and find pasture.
The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.

Don't Be Afraid To Ask

About 100 years ago in Europe, there was a wealthy man, named Rav Eisel Charif of Slonim. His daughter was ready to get married, so Rav Eisel sought the best young man. In those days, "the best young man" meant the top Yeshiva student. So Rav Eisel traveled to the town of Volozhin, which was brimming under the tutelage of its famous Rosh Yeshiva, the Netziv. (It is said that in the years the Netziv ran the Yeshiva, some 10,000 students passed through.) When Rav Eisel arrived, he walked into the study hall, made a loud klop on the table, and announced: "I have a very difficult question on a passage in the Talmud. Whoever can supply the correct answer will have my daughter's hand in marriage."

A great buzz swept through the study hall. The chance to marry Rav Eisel's daughter! Soon a long line formed, and one by one the students were given their chance to provide the answer. And one by one, Rav Eisel rejected the answers as incorrect. This went on for days. Some students even stood in line 2, 3, 4 times. But still no one came up with the correct answer. When the students had all exhausted their options, Rav Eisel packed his bags and began to head out of town.

He had just reached the edge of the city, when he heard a voice shouting after him: "Rav Eisel, Rav Eisel!" He turned around to see a young Yeshiva student running in his direction. The student explained: "Rav Eisel, I know I wasn't able to satisfy the condition for marriage, but just for my own sake, sir, could you please tell me what is the correct answer?"

"Aha!" shouted Rav Eisel. "You will be my son-in-law!"

In our lives, the pursuit of truth can sometimes be stifled if we don't have the courage to ask. Seeking another's help is an admission that I don't have all the answers myself. This may necessitate asking an uncomfortable question. Or humbly admitting I don't know. Or risking the appearance of ignorance. But all this is infinitesimal when compared to a life perpetuated in falsehood. The Yeshiva student demonstrated this courage; it is the hallmark of intellectual honesty.
Rabbi Shagra Simmons